Inspired by personal experiences, I make work about the body and intimacy within the context of religion. It is rare in the Puerto Rican culture to enter a home that does not have at least one iconographic object. Since I was a small child I have always been fascinated with iconography. There are certain pieces in the homes of my family that have been there so long that I don’t remember when they weren’t there. One thing that is peculiar about my upbringing in the context of my cultural tradition is that my mother never instilled in me the faith and devotion the rest of my family always had in Catholicism. Whenever I questioned my mother about why we had Catholic iconography she would reply simply that she thought they were pretty. Reflecting back on this as an adult I understand that it was tradition or maybe even social expectations that caused us to always have iconography around.
Religion has always managed to control society by dictating what is appropriate behavior regarding a number of issues. I began working with the issue of the influence religion has on intimacy and sexuality between people. How might an environment of religious iconography affect a person who has desires? There is also the issue of the secret lives of religious leaders who on one hand tell us to suppress our desires, and on the other hand find themselves to be merely human and incapable of suppressing their own. It is not unheard of for a priest to keep a lover, and while maybe some may know about it, it is never mentioned. Similarly, it is actually very common for people to have intimate relationships with other people outside of what the church tells us is appropriate, and we tend to not speak openly about those for fear of social disapproval. I put these ideas into a body of photographic work in which I depict a man and a woman in private moments. They are not physically touching each other, but I imply by staging, framing and lighting that there is a secret moment about to happen or has already occurred. I also create images in which I depict intimate encounters with iconography, for example, a bible, rosary, or crucifix. In this particular series titled Fixation, I want to imply that there is an abnormally strong obsession with these objects that has lead to psychosexual behavior. I also want to convey ideas of taboo within the context of religion, including in the church itself.
While working with these ideas, I experienced the loss of my great-aunt. She was one of my closest relatives and has always been an extremely important part of my life. Returning to Puerto Rico for her funeral I found that religion and tradition also dictated the way we were allowed to mourn her. Her body was prepared in what is deemed an appropriate way for viewing. On display to us, we caressed and kissed her body, kneeling in front of it the way many do to the iconographic statues in churches. Tradition also dictates we pray the rosary for her at the wake and for nine days after the burial. The rosary is a prayer in which there is a specific verse spoken by a leader, and a certain verse repeated by the congregation, over and over again. During this experience I came to some realizations. One being that we display the corpses of our loved ones, which at that point is simply an empty vessel, for adoration the same way we do man made iconographic objects that contain no real power. Another is that ritualistic activities, such as praying the rosary, become mindless and therefore meaningless due to their extreme repetitive nature. I began thinking about how I can convey these ideas through artwork and chose the medium of performance installation. Performance allows me to physically create ritual, even if completely abstracted. It also allows me to create work about the body by using the body as an art object. This is exemplified in one piece in which I display my own body in a plexigals case I crafted to fit my dimensions.
Throughout my body of work my pieces all deal with intimacy between people or objects within the context of religion. While inspired by specific events in my life, I want them to communicate specific emotional, psychological, or psychosexual qualities regardless of whether or not the viewer can identify with the biographical experience.